The Game

So why have I not updated my blog for over a month?

Truth is I have been insanely busy, I don't even twitter anywhere near as much as I did previously. My life is usually one entire round of tasks, chores & 'Projects', but this last few weeks has been stoopid beyond belief.

Main cause of my increased workload has been the fact that we sold the house and OH finally decided on a place to move to. This is a modern 4 bedroomed house on a quiet established, but developing estate in a neighbouring village. Problem 1 is our furniture has been bought for a large Victorian Town House with high ceilings and big rooms [and I mean big] very little of our furniture will go into the new house..... problem 2 Accumulated objects, books, 'stuff' .....nowhere for them to go.

Then there are the organisational things like Solicitors, Mortgages, Removal companies, ...... and ESTATE AGENTS... Let 's just say that the amount of effort our estate agent has put into selling our house does not match the bloody outrageous fee they are charging. Grrrrr.

Amongst all this [and much more].....I went and bought my old caravan off my ex. It was a fair price, and although there was a bit of damage, she [ex] had left all appropriate gear with it. So the Bank holiday was spent with OH and her daughter having their first time in a tourer. Mad weekend as we had a wedding to go to on the Sat. The toilet facilities and making bed each night was a challenge for them I think. Time will tell whether this was a wise purchase?

So, there we have it, another daft chapter in my odd life.

'On with the Game then Holmes?

Yes, Watson, the game's afoot.......'

Stereotype reactions

So, the world is on the brink of a Pandemic of a Influenza variant [H1N1] ??

I have been watching the news, surfing the net, monitoring the twitterings and generally observing people do exactly what they were forecast to do.

I was part of a NHS Pandemic planning group for the last big scare, which petered out thankfully. However part of our briefing was a prediction of how the population would respond and how that would affect the course of the disease process. Fair play to the Brits we are following the stereotype to the letter. A significant percentage of people will sit and say ' this is all blown up of proportion....' or 'Media induced hype...' or worse' I have the constitution of an ox, never get the Flu..'...They will do nothing and set their face about not changing their habits at all.

Another significant percentage will panic and flood the health services demanding treatment they don't need.

The losers will be the vulnerable whose immune system has been compromised by illness and /or medication. They will be put at risk by the pig headed spreading disease around unnecessarily and the attention seeking using up vital stocks of anti virals uselessly.

What will be interesting this time around is that Pandemics will hit healthy immune system adults because it is a new variant.... stiff upper lip will be useless, although it might help the undertaker to shave you prior to your internment.

The good news in all this is that the UK has probably the most advanced systems and preparations in place for combatting a Flu outbreak of this scale. Much more advanced than USA for example .....

All we have to do is follow some basic hygiene rules. Good hand washing, sneeze into the crook of your arm not your bare hands, Use disposable tissues when possible then flush away as soon as possible. Avoid attending GP surgery or A&E depts unless serious complications set in. Increase fluids, use Paracetamol and stay off work. Avoid crowds and public gatherings...

Just doing this will shorten the Virus's progress through the population.

Silver Lining?? This is not Bird Flu.... now that little bugger would have wreaked havoc had it become a Pandemic......

In the word's of Corporal Jones...Don't Panic........just be sensible.

Spring

Spring, I like Spring... the vivid greens turning the landscape fresh and inviting....

I am fortunate that I live where I do...{North Wales Coast} It has loads going for it:

Scenery in spades, 2 mins from beach, 10 mins from rolling pastures, 35 mins from Snowdownia, 45 mins from Major Cities and shopping centres. A half decent trunk road goes right across the country. The weather is temperate, and generally tame [Although Towyn in the early 90's was the exception that proved the rule]..... and the countryside is spectacular right now, especially on a sunny day.

So with my love for my area rekindled, I am going to reignite an old pastime of mine .........Caravanning [Fuck you Clarkson, I pay as much road tax as you do...] I am genuinely looking forward to pleasant weekend on the Lleyn Peninsula or on Anglesey... maybe down to South Wales .... maybe !!

I love the peace and quiet of a caravan, the sense of freedom from mealtimes, and regulation associated with Hotels and the like. It is also going to be cheaper :))

Here's hoping for a long warm summer..........

Why do men die first???

I was sent this by a female friend of mine.... apart from being funny, it is sort of sad...

Why do men die first?


This is a question that has gone unanswered for centuries...... but, now we know.

If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race...you're a male chauvinist.
If you stay home and do the housework...you're a pansy.

If you work too hard...there's never any time for her
If you don't work enough...you're a good-for-nothing bum.

If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay...this is exploitation.
If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay.....you should get off your lazy behind and find something better.

If you get a promotion ahead of her.....that is favoritism.
If she gets a job ahead of you......it's equal opportunity.

If you mention how nice she looks......it's sexual harassment.
If you keep quiet..........it's male indifference.

If you cry............you're a wimp.
If you don't........you're an insensitive bastard.
If you make a decision without consulting her......... you're a chauvinist.
If she makes a decision without consulting you...... she's a liberated woman.

If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy....... that's domination.
If SHE asks you.........it's a favor.

If you appreciate the female form and frilly underwear...... you're a pervert.
If you don't..............you're gay.

If you like a woman to shave her legs and keep in shape..............you're sexist.
If you don't.................you're unromantic.

If you try to keep yourself in shape................you're vain.
If you don't................you're a slob.

If you buy her flowers.............you're after something.
If you don't....................you're not thoughtful.

If you're proud of your achievements........ you're full of yourself.
If you don't....................you're not ambitious.

If she has a headache............she's tired.
If you have a headache.............you don't love her anymore.

If you want it too often.........you're oversexed.
If you don't..........there must be someone else.


Men die first because they want to.

Recollections Begin

Part of my reasoning to start this blog was to share some memories, a feat I have spectacularly underachieved at so far.

So, where to begin? I would start at the beginning, but that would be too time consuming and frankly, boring. I would start my recollections from when I started work... but to honest a plastic factory is a plastic factory and bundling plastic pipes into long hessian sacks was as boring as it sounds.

Nope, I will transport you to a time in the summer of 1975 and my attempt to get a job at a Mental Hospital. After visiting a relative there, I had dated a girl who worked as a cadet nurse and she had inspired me to devote myself to the support and care of others worse off than me. Actually she told me it was a doddle and they would pay me to go to college.

So I ended up in front of a double door that was fully 20 feet high and 10 feet wide [What the fuck went through here ??? ] Inside the first sight was a clock that went backwards and a marble bust of someone who looked extremely constipated. That fact that the receptionist spoke from behind a screen gave the impression for a moment that the voice was coming from the constipated bust figure. I should have left then.......

In the following 32 years I have met, befriended, nursed, annoyed, argued with and enjoyed more characters than I would ever meet in an office ... Had some of the funniest moments of my life, and some of the worst it has to be said.....

An early recollection was the sports dept. Wards of patients would come to the main hall and participate in remedial exercises.... Swinging arms in time and shaking legs, sitting and standing, standing on one leg etc. all in time to the music, which was invariably 1st world war vintage. Surreal is the term that comes to mind now. Another task was to take the more able bodied on walks etc. with staff off the wards. On one occasion we attempted to play rounders on the cricket pitch... ignoring advice from older students not to be daft !! we lost 2 patients that morning, one running off in full pelt trying to shoot rabbits with his imaginary gun. We found him knee deep in the stream/river trying to tickle imaginary trout. The other hid in the inside of the cricket roller to sleep..... frightening the life out of the poor sods who went to move it an hour later to get at the boiler room door. At this time of my life I was 17, seriously stupid and gifted with a degree of optimism for life that would see me get into all manner of scrapes & near misses .... I wouldn't trade those memories in for a King's Ransom.

The hospital is long gone but memories linger [and I am sure, with time, distort] and I will attempt to recall some of the more memorable ones here [after verifying the accuracy with others] ..... Oh and checking the laws on slander and libel :o)))

Tell me that it's true.......

Today I had a request to retweet a post in support of a project by some mums, to help the NSPCC by downloading a copy of 'Tell me there's a Heaven', A request I passed on and duly downloaded the track. I asked myself '...why this one?? ' I have tons of this stuff via e mail, facebook, Twitter and acres of trees are pushed through my doorstep pushing some cause or other. I can't honour them all, I have neither the time, energy or resources. However I do choose a few to support, and that support is ongoing despite appeals or offers ..... I have seen all the Psychobabble about why we do this and been in a few discussions about which charities are more deserving than others etc. It's all Acaedemic.... we all know why WE do it and we keep it to ourselves and keep supporting the ones we choose.

This one, I love the track, didn't have it, wanted it and a charity benefitted. That sounds like a win to me.

On other topics, my son got burgled the other night, some toerag(s) got in and nicked some stuff. He is a recent student, he can't afford to replace all this stuff and insurance is an expensive commodity and difficult to get..... I just hope whatever piece of lowlife tries to plug the stuff in and gets electrocuted, then gets arrested and spends days in cold turkey, followed swiftly by some life altering accident. Benevolent ?? me? No. My bio says warm and generous.... but that only applies if you live within societies laws and conventions.

Finally, Congratulations to Oirland and their Grand Slam. I did think it was beyond them, but I was wrong.... The British & Irish Lions look to be a strong kit this year if the selectors look properly at what happened [and the European Cup]..... I'll be watching.

Apologetic post

I really, really didn't want this blog to develop into a ranting place but several things have conspired to lead me here. Firstly, and a bit of a theme developing here

HBOS..... They are spectacularly useless.... They are still insisting that I cancelled my DD when every time I ring the operators can see that I have done no such thing. As I am a genuinely nice bloke I am giving them another chance to rectify this and just apologise...am I clutching at straws?? Probably.

M56 .... A bloody nightmare example of giving motorway planners a blank piece of paper and saying 'here draw me a road..... ' It is closely followed by the M62 for nightmare roundabouts... Traffic lights that let 2 cars through at a time... crap...

Judgemental People.... to Echo Gemmak500's post from this morning... what is up with these people? Dean Martin had a line which went '... It's your world Frank [Sinatra], we just live in it!! ...' Too many people believe that what they say is right and they say 'you are entitled to your say, then we will do it my way...' The only saving grace is that these people tend to have short brutish lives... Sadly they attempt [not always consciously, admittedly] to screw other lives up in the ensuing melee of their own self belief.

I promise [a note to myself as much as anything] that the next post will be upbeat and positive. If I can't do that just yet maybe a story or two from the past....